Well, despite my investor visa not being processed while in the U.S., I took a gamble and decided to return to Brazil anyway. Although my tourist visa was stamped with an expiration date of August 25th, it technically had seven days left on it since I left the country on August 18th. This was a 50/50 shot, but I knew I couldn't stay in the U.S. with an undetermined return date. And knowing how Brazil works, undetermined wouldn't even be the right description. It would be more like, "Who in the hell knows?" Therefore, I took the gamble, hopped on the 14 hour flight, put on a big smile and a dumb look, and crossed my fingers. The immigration officer took a look at my visa, glanced at me like I was a teenager trying to buy a six-pack of Bud Light, and asked me if I knew that I only had seven days left in the country. Mostly, she was curious because I had just spent five and a half months straight in the country, left for two weeks, and then wanted to come back for only one week. Was I really going to leave after seven days? I was prepared for this exact question and I stone faced her like I was sitting at the final table of the World Series of Poker. My insurance plan was a doctored Delta itinerary with a return date of September 10th, which, I have to admit, I was very proud of (apparently, I was not thinking about what Brazilian prison must be like). I came back strong with the simple answer that I was only coming back for a quick surf trip with my friends. She bought it and so here I am back in the wonderful world of Floripa. Don't ever underestimate the power of persuasion!
Overall, I would have to say that my trip to the U.S. was everything I wanted it to be. My biggest goal, as I wrote earlier, was to spend as much time with family and friends as possible, and I think, with just a few exceptions (Pat - I miss you brother!), I accomplished that. It was extremely, extremely fun to see everyone again. Without a doubt, that is what I miss most. I didn't have a single second of downtime while I was there, but I wouldn't have changed that for the world. Being able to always have friends and family around to do whatever is something that I don't take for granted. It's impossible to replace that no matter where you live. Your best friends will always be just that - the best. You know who your best friends are because they are the people you see after six months and you feel like you never missed a single beat. As for my family, what can I say? Everyone is happy and healthy. I couldn't really ask for more. The real treat was spending a lot of time with my niece. She is almost two years old now and an absolute character. She has more energy than Flavor Flav on crack, which, I suppose, provided some decent incentive for me to use birth control. God bless my sis and Scott for having the energy to raise her. Seriously, they deserve some sort of award or something. I was exhausted after about 10 minutes of hanging with her.
A lot of people have asked me what my impressions were after coming back. I would say that they were mixed. I immediately missed the simplicity and mellow vibe of Floripa. The intensity of the U.S. was glowingly obvious in about the first five seconds. With that being said, I definitely felt at ease in San Francisco. I spent eight years there so I guess this would be no surprise (not to mention that my friends were especially accommodating - thanks for the pad TK!). I think being back in a place that functions incredibly, incredibly well made me comfortable. Also, it is still, and always will be, a beautiful city. However, although this may shock some of you, it continues to be 50 degrees and foggy in San Francisco. People always say that the easiest job in the world is to be a weatherman in San Francisco. "Today, folks, it's 50 degrees and foggy. Back to you Pam." I am no longer acclimated to the fog and cold, and my standard SF North Face collection was packed into storage. Don't let that sun fool you. You step into that shade for longer than 10 seconds, and you'll be stiffer than the Statue of Liberty.
San Diego provided me with exactly what I wanted: sun and surf. I really, really enjoyed my days there. I have heard more than a few times that Floripa reminds people of San Diego 30 years ago, and now I see why. The vibe there was great (except for the 50-year old woman surf Nazi at Swamis but that's a whole other story). We surfed every day and spent lots of time at the beach. Certainly, I could do without the traffic but as I've always said, no place is perfect and you have to take the good with the bad. It was great to spend time with friends there as well. Two dollar Tuesday's at En Fuego was excellent as always! It's amazing how much Facebook can keep you in touch with everyone. You really can't put a prize on that. Obviously, Mark Zuckerberg is trying to prove that to everyone by turning down literally billions of dollars.
As for my last stop, I don't think I've ever been to Scottsdale and not had a blast. Growing up there, things were pretty normal. These days, things have changed. Scottsdale is one giant scene, and it definitely makes me laugh every time. I don't like a lot of the things that have somehow found there way there (lose the bandanas and "sleeves" people!), but overall it is an amazing place. We had some epic nights (with one in particular that is not appropriate for the internet, let alone this blog), and some great days by the pool. It's still hot as balls there (we literally had to quit golf on Friday after 10 holes because we were dying), but hot means bikinis, and I LOVE bikinis!
As I journeyed down the coast, I made a few notes along the way about the things that I noticed and I wanted to share them with you.
The very first thing that I noticed was that the U.S., especially San Francisco, is a LOT more diverse than Brazil. Certainly, it is one of the things that makes the U.S. so special. I was so amazed during my first day there. I literally couldn't believe it. Somehow, I had forgotten what it was like. In Brazil, everyone pretty much looks the same. In the U.S., it looks like a giant Jackson Pollock painting. It probably didn't help that my first two modes of transportation in SF were BART and Muni (pretty much the epicenter of diversity). I heard four languages on my short ride: English, Chinese, Spanish, and jive.
Logging on to my computer for the first time was like going to the future for me. I didn't realize how slow my internet is here until I got a little taste of what it is like back in the U.S. I was downloading songs in about 10 seconds, which takes me about five minutes here. I once had a friend tell me that he liked the internet that way it used to be because he liked the anticipation of watching the page slowly load because it felt like the girl was stripping for him. The genius of that comment was not lost on me. However, I was just in that guy's wedding so it appears that he has moved on and embraced the new internet. I'll be waiting anxiously for it to arrive here...
Laughter. God I miss laughter. I LOVE to laugh. Unfortunately, one of the most difficult things to grasp when you are learning a new language is humor. It's hard enough trying to understand the language, the gestures, the accents, the slang, and everything else. Trying to find humor is almost impossible. Honestly, my friends probably felt like Eddie Murphy when I was around. I was dishing out laughs non-stop. Man, I miss that.
People in the U.S., present company absolutely not excluded, utilize their horns as much as they utilize their brakes. You very rarely hear people use their horns in Brazil. If you drive like a maniac, it's just expected. There is no reason to obnoxiously honk your horn in order to let someone know he is driving out of control. You already know it and he already knows it. I think in the U.S. people expect other cars to part like the Red Sea and make way for them like they're driving the red carpet or something. I never thought this before but if everyone just has a little common courtesy and accepts the fact that nobody drives perfectly, you would be amazed at how much this will result in a better driving experience. BTW, for those of you counting at home, I managed to get Mom and myself from Del Mar to Scottsdale in 5 hours and 15 minutes with two legitimate stops (one included a full sit down Wendy's stop). That record might last as long as DiMaggio's 57-game hitting streak.
The salespeople in the U.S. need a lengthy class in manners. Honestly, at times, I felt more like a Dad pestering his teenage son in the middle of a video game rather than someone trying to patronize the store. In Brazil, people are so happy to have jobs that they'll pretty much do anything for you. I think that in the U.S. there are so many jobs and opportunities that employees completely take if for granted. I felt like I was asking someone to come mow my lawn when all I really wanted to know was if the iTrip would work in Brazil. Totally unreal, and this happened at almost every place I went (one notable exclusion was the Apple Store where I think the salesgirl wanted to come back to Brazil with me).
Everyone kept telling me that they couldn't wait for college football to start and I kept saying that I wouldn't miss it that much. Basically, I was just trying to fool myself since I won't get hardly any of the games (if any at all). I was at a pool party on Saturday where people kept going inside to catch glimpses of the games. Now, it's no joke. I'm really going to have to step up my activities these upcoming Saturday's. I don't want to be thinking about the Sun Devils vs. Georgia or Pac-10 cheerleaders. I just don't.
Apparently, bars in the U.S. still close at 2AM. I'm just getting warmed up at that point. As I write this, it's 10PM in Brazil and I won't be going out for another two hours. An ex-girlfriend's mother once told her than nothing good happens after 2AM. I couldn't agree less. I'm pretty sure that the best times of my life all happened after 2AM. If only I could remember all those times, I would be able to verify that.
As usual, here are some pics of my trip.
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